Sexual Intelligence & Therapy

Dr. Marty Klein¹ facilitates a transformation in our ways of thinking about our sexuality into healthier ones. He helps us to accept and embrace our true selves, and dare to be honest with ourselves and to others about our wants, desires and thoughts. He empowers us by increasing our sexual intelligence. We can visualize a healthier sense of self in every aspect, and increase our overall enjoyment of life.

Thank you!

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¹ Dr Marty Klein is a licensed marriage & family therapist and certified sex therapist for 29 years. He performs therapy , gives lectures, writes books, articles & newsletters, blogs, does media appearances, lobbies, performs forensic work, and runs consultation groups to deliver his message.

His website has more information.

PTI Workshop: Expanding Ability to Work with Veterans (1.5 CEU)

October 27, 2011

Topic

• Workshop is about how to provide more effective therapy to veterans by understanding their military culture.
• The main focus is on how to "talk" to members of the military and their families. Within that topic, stigma issues, the different services and re-integration strategies will be covered.
• There is a CEU of 1.5 Units

Place and time

• October 27, 7-8:30pm, 2011
• At the Process Therapy Institute,
• 16573 Los Gatos-Almaden Road, Los Gatos, CA 95032
• call 408-358-2218 (x3) for direction

Speaker

• Karen Wall is currently working as a registered nurse at inpatient psychiatry at Loma Linda VA hospital.
• She has a degree on MA Counseling psychology at Argosy university.
• She worked as a nursing director in Inpatient mental health at the US Army Corps.

Cost

• No charge for the workshop.
• There is an Administrative fee of $25 if a CEU certificate is required.

Actions

• Please email Elaine Floyer at elaine@processes.org or leave a message at 408-358-2218x417 if you are planning to come.

Dog Therapy for Veterans - Healing with a man's best friend

Daniel & Stanley

"When I drop things, he picks them up for me. When I am in severe pain or having shaking episodes, he will go get someone to help me and then put his head in my lap to comfort me. I always avoid going out in public.

Stanley somehow helps me forget about all the people around me. My focus is on him and now, actually enjoy going out in public with him"

Daniel Copeland- Hermetic, CA

There are many stories like above from veterans who have the opportunity to work with service dogs and therapy dogs. They are specially trained dogs to be part of veterans' lives to heal them and enrich their lives. More information can be found at this site.

Currently, in a few veterans' hospitals, therapy dogs are integral part of sessions. There are testimonies from veterans and families how effective it is. Some cool stories and information about how you might help can be found at this site.

Why is dog therapy so effective? In therapy sessions, many veterans open up their heart, mind, and soul when men's best friends are present. Veterans become available and present to go deep into themselves and face their issues.

Currently, Prolonged Exposure Therapy and Cognitive Process Therapy are considered to be the most effective techniques in working with PTSD. I think there's a good case to be made for including dog therapy as part of the healing Process.

Canine Support Teams has a program for disabled veterans and explains the benefits of a service dog

http://www.caninesupportteams.org/client_stories.html

Therapy for a Lasting Solution

Many clients seek counseling because they can not resolve on-going problems. They repeat the same unproductive behaviors over and over without avail. They know they need to change, want to change, but don't know how to start.

In therapy sessions, with unconditional support from me, a client can gain new perspectives, and can be inspired to try out new ideas to tackle their problems, right in a session.

When a solution is viscerally experienced, permanent shift comes about that can last a lifetime.

An Example of a Session

A client was overwhelmed with work and his personal relationship. In our sessions, he became aware that he had a deep fear of failure. He experimented with role-playing; he tried requesting a job raise, and he simulated asking his spouse for more sexual intimacy. He experienced the process of respecting and expressing his goals and wishes. Then he tried them out in real life, with a confidence that no matter what the outcome, he is a complete and whole person.

Please feel free to call and make an appointment for a free initial consultation to see if I can be of help to you.

Elaine Floyer, PTI MFT intern, 408-358-2218 (x417)

Lady Gaga & Sexuality

According to Time magazine, Lady Gaga is one of the 100 most influential people. What makes her so influential?

Lady Gaga

One of the reason is her unwavering acceptance of herself, and the ability to express it to the whole world. This includes her sexuality. She inspires us all to accept unconditionally who we are, to celebrate ourselves, and enjoy our life fully.

The process of understanding your sexuality, or coming out to yourself and others, or gaining confidence and pride of being who you are, is a major undertaking. There is a great book which gives you practical steps to go about it; "Coming Out Every Day", by Bret K. Johnson, Ph.D. It is geared towards gay, bisexual, questioning men, but it applies to everyone struggling with coming out. I have taken some of the main concepts and listed them as three steps. I believe it would help to start the process of obtaining a healthy, integrated gay or bisexual identity.

Step 1:

Dr Bret Johnson

• Look inward and gain awareness of yourself. Who am I? What kinds of labels am I giving myself? What are my roles and identity?
• Do this with yourself or with a trusted few, who support and respect you. Keeping a journal can help. It is important to be honest with yourself without passing any judgement.
• For example, you might consider yourself homosexual or bisexual, or describe yourself as someone who is attracted to/ falls in love with the same-sex, or is still questioning your sexuality. As you begin to acknowledge this as who you are, eventually you can come to accept yourself more fully.

Step 2:

• Look into things which block you from accepting yourself fully. Do you fear being judged by others? Do you feel anger? Does it show up as pushing others away or self destructive behaviors?
• Writing them down can be a great way of starting. You may consider what and how you want to tackle them differently.
• For example, you may be drinking too much, or allow others to verbally/physically abuse you. You can write down alternative healthier ways of dealing with the situation. You might choose to start by monitoring your drinking and staying away from people who put you down.

Step 3:

• Promote a safe environment for yourself. Physical safety is being safe from bodily harm; emotional safety may include feeling free from other people's words, prejudice or shame. It also may mean having a sense of inner comfort. You can do this by surrounding yourself with people and situations which support and help you to thrive.
• For example, have a couple of good friends you can talk with in confidence. Also, connect with your community. These may include a local gay/bisexual community, club or organization. You can also utilize the internet to find support groups.

In conclusion, after the three steps I delineated, you will know yourself more, be able to accept more fully who you are, and take practical steps to live a more fulfilled life, with integrity and authenticity. For more detailed and complete information, I would recommend Bret Johnson's book.

Thank you Lady Gaga for your fierce integrity in keeping with who you are. You lead by example, and show the world how to be successful by being exactly who you are.

Process Therapy & Eckhart Tolle

Process Therapy & Eckhart Tolle

Introduction

I currently work as a therapist at the Process Therapy Institute (PTI). Process therapy focuses attention on the present moment. Therapists help clients learn to be fully "present," and this in turn enables clients to work through past pain and reframe unhealthy perspectives. This helps to achieve a balance in life, and helps them move forward to accomplish their true goals.

Eckhart Tolle

One of the most prominent thinker and writer with similar approach is Eckhart Tolle. His thesis is summarized as:

•   We need to pay full attention to the present moment. By being fully present, more joy, peace and meaning will flow through us. By being fully present, past problems will affect us less, and we would be able to direct our future action in accordance with our true values.

•   We are already whole as a person, and that we don't need past or future accomplishments to prove ourselves as worthy.

•   Each person's spirituality can be found within oneself.  It's a matter of getting in touch with it.

How do you get in touch with the present?

Below are some of the ways that process therapy and Tolle's teachings can help getting in touch with the present.

1.  Practice staying alert to the present moment, without worrying about the past or future.
2. We can become present by focusing on the simple act of paying 100% attention to whatever we are doing. It could be as simple a thing as walking down the street, or being with a child.
3. Direct your attention to silence, whenever there is such a moment, and enjoy it.
4. Practice mindfulness. It's a practice of inward observation of one's own thoughts and emotion. Do it with no self-judgment or criticism.
5. Be conscious of the fact that earthly materials are impermanent, but our inner spirit is constant.

Process therapy & utilizing the present moment

PTI uses these techniques to help therapists and their clients to be fully present. This facilitates focussing on the important issues and improves the quality and efficiency of the therapy. As a therapist, I practice being more present during my daily life. This improves the quality of my personal life as well as the quality of my therapy. After therapy, I'm joyful to have clients report being more at ease and experience less stress, in addition to addressing their specific issues.

Learning more about Eckhart Tolle

Eckhart Tolle has written 2 major books, "The power of now" and "The new earth"

He has collaborated with Oprah on a webinar discussing his book, "New Earth"

The full program is available for free on Oprah's website, http://www.opraheckhart.com.

Process Therapy Institute Eckhart Tolle Study Group

I  am starting a study group at the Process Therapy Institute. It will meet every two weeks on Thursday night at 7:00pm. The first meeting will be in PTI Building 2, 16573 Los Gatos Almaden Rd, Los Gatos, CA 95032. Please don't hesitate to contact me for more details, or just show up!

References

•   The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment, New World Library, October, 1999 ISBN 1-57731-152-3 (HC) ISBN 1-57731-480-8 (PB)

•   Practicing the Power of Now: Essential Teachings, Meditations, and Exercises from The Power of Now, New World Library, October 10, 2001 ISBN 1-57731-195-7 (HC)

•   Oprah/Eckhart Webcast http://www.opraheckhart.com

The Zen of Zin: Lessons from A Dachshund

We have whole lot to learn from our dogs in living a less stressful and peaceful life. My good friend Henri often talks about his beloved dog Zin, a 10 year old Dachshund. How is it that Zin is not afflicted by daily stress, an inevitable part of life? The following are Henri's observations on the Zen of Zin.

•   Zin doesn't obsess about the past. When his owner Claire, Henri's late wife, suddenly died in her sleep, Henri was devastated. He was even more saddened when Zin faithfully waited by the garage door for her to  return from work. Zin did so for two weeks and then stopped, realizing that Claire was not driving into that garage any time soon.

•   Zin accepts the present situation. When Claire, his previous "top-dog" disappeared, Zin understood there was a new top-dog in the house. Without any resistance, Zin accepted Henri as his new top-dog, and integrated Henri into his new world.

•   Zin doesn't hold grudges. When Henri goes away for a long period of time, and then comes back, Zin might give him the cold shoulder for half an hour, but then is always happy to see him.

•   Zin doesn't try to change what can't be changed. When Henri went through bouts of acute grieving for Claire's death, Zin quietly stayed in the background, and rejoined Henri when he was cheerful. If Henri is angry, Zin disappears and comes back when the coast is clear.

   So this is Zin's Zen in a nutshell. Don't obsess about the past. Don't stress about the future. Live in the present moment. Don't hold grudges. Don't try to fix what can't be changed. Go with the flow. These are the keys to a more peaceful existence, for me, for Henri and for you. Thanks, Zin.